Friday 23 May 2014

4 years.

4 years ago almost to the day I walked into my first weight watchers meeting. I was a first year university student, living away from home for the first time and was living off frozen foods. I'd always been large but had put on weight in the 7 months I'd been at university. 

17th may 2010 marks the start of my weight loss journey,I walked into that meeting and weight 16st 12.5lbs. I proceeded to lose 6 stone through a combination of meetings and online, although more successful when through meetings. Whilst studying for my degree and living the full student lifestyle. I never missed out on anything and freshens week in second year I also lost 3lbs!

The last year for me has been tough, mentally, physically and emotionally. I'm not passing the blame for my weight gain but life happens and I'm starting to accept that. For months I was in denial about my weight gain. Still squeezing into my size 12's. Feeling like a fraud when I posted comparison photos and got featured in magazines. But I'm learning that I've earnt that, I'm not the 16stone girl I used to be. 

The last year has seen me fall in love, get a promotion in work, move out from living with my best friend and move in with my boyfriend, lose a baby, be diagnosed with depression and run a marathon. And emotionally and mentally it's taken me a while to catch up. But with help I'm getting there. 

I needn't be ashamed at the weight I've put on, I've always been an emotional eater and I always will be it's learning to cope with situations as they arise and that's what I know how to now. 

As of next week (I'm currently writing this by the pool in 26degrees) I will be returning to weight watcher meetings, they work for me so why change what works? I'm excited to lose weight again, for me. To be healthy, to start running properly again and gaining PR's. 

I may not 5lbs from goal where I was this time last year, I'm more like 3 stone (I don't really know as I haven't stepped on a scales for a while and I won't until I rejoin meetings) but I've grown up, I've learnt a lot, I've accomplished a lot, not many people run a marathon but I have that shiney medal hanging on my mirror reminding me every day I did it! 

I've learnt that weight loss journeys have ups and downs. And this is my new journey, I don't need to look back and regret the weight I've put on, I haven't put the whole 6 stone back on, and if it wasn't for weightwatchers and some good decisions being in the back of my head I would have, but it's more like 3 stone I've put on. I've lost it before. I can do it again. It helped me through the last year and I've come out stronger on the other side. So here's to being back on the wagon, and being excited about it. Here's to being healthy and happy! 

As the title goes "you haven't failed until you quit trying" 

Xxx

3 comments:

  1. Honest. Brave. Inspiring.

    Its so easy to let things slip off track but what is so encouraging is to see your attitude - that hasnt changed and you know you can do this. Yes, it'll be hard but you are harder! xx

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  2. I'm so sorry to hear you lost a baby, sweetheart. That must have been awful. You've always struck me as a strong woman, so I think you can do whatever you put your mind to. Life is full of ups and downs but that is what it is meant to be. It is how grow and learn.
    Something I've been thinking about recently is that maybe I'm not meant to be at my lowest weight. I'm about 10lbs heavier than my lowest recent weight. It was really hard to keep my weight down that low and I was so obsessive about food. I have a weight where my body seems to be fairly comfortable (I'm a few lbs heavier than that and I want to get back to that) Maybe your body has a weight where it feels comfortable as well?

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    1. Thanks sweetie. My heads getting to the right place now where I know I am capable of loosing the weight again. I got to my lowest at 10st 5lbs. I wasn't at goal but I was comfortable and happy and you're right that's what I'm aiming for again. xxx

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